Tuesday, 4 September 2007

What a difference a year makes

Today is my birthday. This time last year, I wasn't too happy about being another year older. Moving house and changing jobs was all part of a plan to try to get the sort of life I would enjoy on my own, having given up on waiting and hoping that I might meet someone with whom I would build a life together. I was firmly convinced that I would always be single, and was 99% resigned to that. What I was less resigned to was the idea that I would never have children, and I bought a larger house in the hope that I might one day be able to use the extra space to do some fostering.

I moved out of my old flat a couple of days after my birthday last year, and stayed with my sister for a few months until this house became available. One of the first things I did after moving in was to get a wireless broadband connection, and my television sat idle in the corner as I began to spend my evenings surfing the net.

I thought I was 100% resigned to staying single, but for some reason I still held out enough hope to decide to sign up with match.com. I had already tried Yahoo Personals a couple of years earlier, and the people I had met had no interest in getting to know me better - I never got past a first date, and my confidence in my attractiveness to the opposite sex sank even lower than it had been before.

So it was with some trepidation that I wrote a profile for match.com. I decided to be totally honest. I didn't beat about the bush and say things that I thought someone might want to hear - I said exactly who I was and what sort of qualities I was looking for in a partner. Having written my profile, I ran a search for anyone who might match my interests. The first profile it spat back at me was New Man's, and as soon as I'd read it I sent him an e-mail. He, too, had almost entirely given up on ever meeting someone, and had been browbeaten into signing up with match.com by his best friend.

The rest, as they say, is history.

Actually, that's not true. The rest is our future. I hope we'll be able to have children - it's what I've dreamt of all my life, and New Man would make a wonderful father. But one of the reasons I know New Man is the right man for me is that he's the only person I've ever been able to imagine being happy with even if we can't have children.

And so this year, I'm looking forward to my (ahem, 38th - but don't tell anybody) birthday with considerably more optimism. I love my job. I live in a lovely house, with friendly neighbours, in an ideal location. And most importantly, I'll be spending the evening out to dinner with my wonderful fiance.

This past year, I have been truly blessed. Deo Gratias.

18 comments:

Emitte said...

Sorry I didn't say so earlier, but my very best congratulations! May the Lord give you many beautiful and loving children. God bless you.

Merri said...

My what a year can do! Happy Birthday!!

newhousenewjob said...

Thank you both. Unfortunately, it looks as though my birthday's about to begin with an all-night session to finish getting ready for the day's teaching, followed by a difficult journey to work due to a 72-hour strike which has brought most of the London Underground to a standstill, but I'm holding out for that evening with New Man... :¬)

Esther said...

A very happy and blessed birthday to you dear NH!

newhousenewjob said...

Thank you Esther. :¬)

ashlyn said...

Felix dies natalis!

Beth said...

Happy Birthday _____ (I feel like I know you but I don't know your name :) So there you go!

And what a great year this was - and this one will be even better! Congratulations!

fiona said...

Dear NHNJ,

Many happy returns!

newhousenewjob said...

Thank you all for your good wishes. I really have had the most fantastic birthday, and have been made to feel really special.

Beth - I know, weird isn't it? I keep catching myself almost referring to New Man as "New Man" when talking to family etc! You know the important things about me... though I suppose before you come to visit I'll have to tell you my address too. ;¬)

Beth said...

Yep, we'll need to know your address :)

Hope you had a GREAT birthday. Hey have you guys set a date yet?

Leticia said...

May I wish you happiness, and children!
A-hem, soon you'll have to change the name of your web address to "newhousenewjobnewhubby"!

newhousenewjob said...

Thanks Beth. It'll be next June hopefully, but no firm date set yet.

Thanks also Leticia. Yes, the name could end up getting a bit long... :¬)

Jennifer F. said...

How wonderful! Congratulations!

diana said...

Oh I am so sorry I didn't wish you Happy Birthday on the day!!!But isn't it wonderful how things changed so much to give you life you wanted!

If ever God Forbid, I was single again, I would definitely do the matchmaking thing. Just fantastic results.

newhousenewjob said...

Thanks Diana. Yes, it's amazing how attitudes have changed towards internet dating - particularly in big cities, it's amazing how hard it is to meet other single people. We know other people who've met through match.com and are now married, so it obviously attracts people who are serious about a relationship and asks the right questions so they can find each other.

FloridaWife said...

I met my husband on match.com!!!!!

Great story!!!!

I do hope that you will have no trouble having children. You should start reading Taking Charge of Your Fertility now if you haven't read it already in order to get a jump start on tracking your cycles and all and ensuring you don't have any problems.

God bless.

newhousenewjob said...

Thank you. I read your post on how you met your husband, so I knew we had that in common. It does seem to be the most successful of the online dating services - I know several people who met their spouses through it.

FloridaWife said...

I'm glad you liked that post of mine. I liked yours!