Wednesday, 13 June 2007

The dangers of a vivid imagination

My mother has this thing where she rehearses conversations in her head. She'll provide the responses she expects us to give, repeat the conversation over and over until she's perfected both her side and ours, and then after several days she'll suddenly burst out, "But why won't you come and see us next weekend?" Ummm, well, because you haven't asked me to?

Sadly, I seem to have inherited this tendency. I was talking to my mother on the phone on Sunday and she said something that upset me. The conversation has continued in my head ever since, and got to the stage last night where I was on the verge of phoning her up and saying, "For Heaven's sake, Mother, will you just give it a rest?"

It annoys me like anything when she does it to me. So I'm trying hard to bite my lip and not say anything. In fact, my parents are coming to see me this weekend, so I can actually involve her in the conversation. I might even let her decide what to say for her own parts...


Christine said...

I am SO glad I'm not the only person who does this! There have been plenty of times in my nearly 14 years of marriage where Hubby and I have entire arguments (and sometimes even make up) without his ever knowing it or uttering a word.

I told him one evening that I'd been arguing with him in my head all day and that I was sorry for being so snippy before dinner. He had no idea that I'd been mad at him about anything. And he actually hadn't done anything, but I was imagining this whole conversation about something.

Sometimes I think I need to get out more.

newhousenewjob said...

Oh yes, Christine - whoever said "it takes two to have an argument" obviously just didn't have such a rich inner life as we do!

Christine said...

"Rich inner life" sounds so much more palatable than "crazy as a loon."

I should recommend that phrase to Hubby.

newhousenewjob said...

Well, if nothing else, you could persuade him to use that phrase when you're having conversations with him in your head - it might help you resolve the imagined arguments a bit quicker!